Saturday, October 4, 2008

my new calling

Chris and I went to see The Dutchess this evening. In true O'Connor fashion, we had tentative plans to go see a movie tonight (which was decided last night when we chose to go out to dinner Friday night and do a movie Saturday night so as not to leave our ever-so-sweet, definitely not spoiled puppy for too long) but had a little trouble settling on a time and movie. Mom had mentioned that Appaloosa was great, so unlike most of the time we plan to go to the movies, I actually had a lead.

It should have been simple. But I was suffering from a minor stomach ache and major laziness today, so before we knew it, as usual, it was 6:00 and we had no definite plans. We spent the next 45 minutes or so debating which movie to see, what theater to go to (trying to save money, so maybe the dollar theater, but then there wouldn't be time to get dinner first and I'm really hungry, but do we really want to take out a loan to see a movie at Northpark, but no where else has a good movie time), where to get a quick dinner (again, trying to save money, also in a hurry, but will it totally ruin the experience if we are in such a rush that we can't even enjoy it? I'm learning though... unlike that one time I got all bent out of shape because we only had time for a rushed meal at McDonald's before running to catch our movie, this time I did a quick attitude check and assured Chris that I just wanted to spend time with him), and asking each other how long we really wanted to leave our darling puppy.

This is how we do decisions. I don't know how other people manage to make decisions so quickly. Between Chris being so detail-oriented and me being such a worrywort, we can come up with every reason in the world not to do just about anything. Hence the unfinished kitchen wall, which we stripped of wallpaper about four months ago but have yet to repaint.

Aaanyway, we finally decided to go to Potbelly (it's quick, cheap, on the way, and we had a gift card, so in my mind, that makes the decision to go to a real theater rather than the dollar theater a wash). Also they had soup, which would be easy on my stomach. Chris even tried to sidetrack me, but I stuck to my guns:

Chris: Oh, there's Boston Market, wanna go there?

Me, as Chris is getting in the right turn lane to go to Potbelly: Oooh, they do have really good tortilla soup...

Chris: Quick, which one??

Me: Potbelly! See how I made that decision??

We both celebrate; we are practically giving each other high fives, which is something we don't do enough, I might add. We know our weaknesses and celebrate successes. That's what makes us work *rolling eyes at self*.

So that's how we ended up having a quick dinner at Potbelly before rushing over to a theater we had never been to (the only one that had a good show time, of course). After Chris being sweet and telling me that I didn't need to rush to finish my dinner (my mouth was already scourched from the soup, but it was good anyway) because it was ok if we weren't on time, we had a little trouble navigating those crazy exits that we have come to love and adore so much and therefore were a bit later than we had anticipated.

And that's how we ended up going to see The Dutchess instead of Appaloosa. And that's also how I ended up feeling sympathetic depression as my thoughts turned toward what it would be like to have to hand my child over to someone else. Which led to thoughts of being a mom, which led to thoughts of being a stay-at-home mom, which led to concerns about having enough money to stay at home, which led to internet searches for ways to make money from home, which led to reading stories about internet scams before resuming the search for ideas.

All the while I was remembering in the back of my mind a college classmate who decorated and sold cakes and a teacher who did a training I attended last summer and who taught part time and sold cakes while staying at home with her girls in the afternoon, which led me to conclude that I need to take classes in cake decorating. I've always wanted to be an artsy, crafty person but I've always failed miserably. However,I keep thinking if I could make it seem like a logical, step-by-step process type of thing instead of a blank canvas, maybe I could do it. This may be a bit optimistic, but just go with it. After all, I love the idea of staying at home with my children and baking cakes all day, although pregnancy/childbearing + lots of cake = fatty, but never mind that.

And thus I have avoided another panic attack by creating the perfect plan for making money while having the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom.

*big sigh of relief*


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